focus: it’s either too little or too much

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It’s weird how depression hits sometimes related to AuDHD things. This morning I zoned out for about 40 minutes working on a client site, not noticing that I was waiting on my espresso or chat notifications popping up on my screen.

But more often than not I just can’t focus at all. I get overwhelmed with my task list and instead of getting anything done I let it get longer and longer with new tasks while stressing about the existing ones. It compounds, and that’s part of where negative thoughts creep in along with the anxiety. You can’t do this, you are an impostor, and you should just give it all up.

This is an issue when it comes to trying to run my own business, trying to maintain fun side projects, and trying to keep a household organized. It’s also just an issue with life in general. Constantly feeling like the worst things that detractors say about me online have to be true, because if they weren’t, why would I feel so bad? Clearly I’m not meant to be around other people, I think.

I know that this is a lie, but it’s an easy lie for my brain to tell itself and to then reinforce without outside influence.

Anyway, listen to this and the rest of the newsletter as a vlog!


Fame as we knew it has been obliterated – Shannon Liao, Polygon

Moderators are the unpaid backbone of Twitch – Nicole Carpenter, Polygon

“Other Trans People Make Me Dysphoric”: Trans Assimilation and Cringe – Charlie Markbreiter, The New Inquiry

Life After “Calvin and Hobbes” – Rivka Galchen, New Yorker


I hacked an AI into a 1980s intercom. – abe’s projects

We Need To Talk About “Authoritarianism” – Second Thought

I made a horror game in one day – shawcat

Inflatables and the adults who love collecting them | Documentary | Beyond the Fandom – Ash Coyote

I Don’t Think “Plush” Knows What Furries Are? – Boring Keith


Underrepresented in Tech Inclusive Webinar Series

TWRP – Have You Heard?

Let’s Save The Earth – NSP

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